I got me a bad woman
With the meanest face around.
Smell her comin two miles away
And she weighs 900 pounds.
I woke up this morning
Rolled over, yes it's true.
Looked my lady in the face
What a thing to wake up to.
She cooked me some kinda food
What it is, I'll never know.
She fried it up in lard and grease
"Here's breakfast," I was told.
I worked my fingers to the bone
It was hard, just like I told ya.
When I got home at six o clock
Her ass was watching Oprah.
I told her "Hey, I've had enough!
Baby, this gotta stop!"
She hurled a skillet at my head
And beat me with the mop.
I wrote this poem in English class today. It's not about my girlfriend, we get along great, it's just about bad women in general. Don't let anybody tell you the blues are dead.